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Essay?! easy 10 points:))?

just tell me if it's good or not and please read it! how can i make it better?? Do you know how and for what reasons the first 13 colonies of North America were found? Many of us today don’t know why these colonies were established, but we should because it’s an extremely important event in history. Many of the first settlers in the North America came from England, they came for reasons such as these: wanted land to plant on, religious freedom, wanted to become rich or famous, needed a new beginning, wanted to escape paying debts and others. The first successful settlement was Jamestown, Virginia and then other colonies arose. The 13 colonies of North America are: Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Rhode Island, Connecticut (New England Colonies), New York, Delaware, New Jersey, Pennsylvania (Middle Colonies), Virginia, Maryland, North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia (Southern Colonies). Each of these colonies have different laws, government, religious beliefs, way of life and how they were set up. First, lets talk about the New England Colonies and the first successful settlement Jamestown, Virginia. During the 1580s English had tried a couple of times to establish a colony on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean, but their attempts failed. Later, The Virginia Company was developed, it was a joint-stock company. In December 1606 they began their journey and on April 1607 they entered the Chesapeake Bay. They named their new settlement Jamestown in honor of their king who granted them the right to organize settlement. The colony was build on a peninsula so it could defend itself from attack but many died do to disease, hard labor, weather and hunger. With the Virginian leader John Smith the colony survived 2 years, but it was later John Rolfe who learned how to grow tobacco and saved the colony. Virginia had made a great profit growing tobacco, then many others came to the colony and House of Burgesses was formed to let people have a say in their government. Groups of people came to the New England Colonies in order to find religious freedom. At that time many people disagreed with the practices of the Anglican Church and wanted to reform it, those people were called Puritans. Others who wanted to leave and set up their own churches were called Separatists (Pilgrims). Separatists were later persecuted in England which caused them to flee to Netherlands. They did not stay their long causing to lack of jobs, so they made an arrangement with the Virginia Company to settle in North America for free religious practice. One of the New England Colonies is Massachusetts. It was founded for religious freedom by John Carver, William Bradford and John Winthrop, and settled during 1620-1630. Second colony is New Hampshire, it was founded because of profit of trade and fish by Ferdinando Gorges and John Mason and settled in c.1620. Another colony is Rhode Island, which was founded for religious freedom by Roger Williams in 1636. Last of the colonies is Connecticut which was founded in 1635 by Thomas Hooker because of profit from fur trade, farming; religious and political freedom. Second, the Middle Colonies, that also play a huge role. The first colony is New York, it was founded by the Dutch settlers in1624 to expand trade. The colony had a really an excellent harbor that the English wanted to acquire. So in 1664 they attacked and Peter Stuyvesant who was the governor surrendered because he was not prepared for the battle. King Charles II the gave this colony to his brother Duke of York, who renamed it New York. New York became a proprietary colony. Later, the colony became widely populated and demanded a representative government. The English government allowed New York to elect a legislature starting in 1691. A different colony is New Jersey, it was founded by John Berkeley and George Carteret during 1638 and gained profit from selling land. The colony did not gain much success and became a royal colony. Another colony is Delaware, it was founded by Swedish settlers in 1638 in order to expand trade. Last Middle Colony is Pennsylvania founded by William Penn in 1682 and gained profit by selling land/ religious freedom. Penn belonged to a Protestant group of dissenters called Quakers. They believed that everyone was equal in god’s view, had toleration towards other beliefs and were pacifists. Penn wrote the city’s first constitution and believed that settlers should pay for land(since it’s the Native America’s). He also encouraged others to come by advertising in different languages and granted the colonists the right to elect representatives to the legislative assembly. Finally, The Southern Colonies that were founded for different reasons. The colony of Maryland was lead by Cecil Calvert son of George Calvert who always wanted to create a safe place for the Catholics. Cecil had sent two of his brothers to rule the colony when he gained it in1634. They at first turned to tobacco as the main crop knowing it saved Virginia, but planted corn as well. The city Baltimore founded in 1729 had became Maryland’s largest port and settlement. As you know there were conflicts between colonies and one was the boundary between Maryland and Pennsylvania. It was soon resolved but another conflict arose when Calverts had welcomed Protestants in Maryland. As you know the colony of Virginia became very wealthy and it kept on growing. William Berkeley had made an agreement that for a piece of land he would keep his settlers out of the Native American lands. Nathaniel Bacon, a leader of the western part of Virginia did not agree. He and others had settled in Native American lands and set fire to the capital Jamestown. It was known as the greatest rebel ever. Bacon’s sudden illness and death was the only thing that kept him from taking charge of Virginia. A new proprietary colony was set up called Carolina. It was ruled by eight prominent members of kings court. They divided the colony and each ruled one part. John Locke was the one to write constitution for the colony. The people of the colonies disagreed and went they’re separate ways creating North Carolina and South Carolina. The Carolina’s was the colony who had many rice fields and more than half of the population were enslaved Africans. In 1729 the Carolinas became two royal colonies. The last colony and final colony is Georgia. It was founded in 1733 by James Oglethorpe for religious freedom; protection against Spanish Florida and a safe home for debtors. This was a safe colony if you had not payed your debts. In Conclusion, I hope that you understand how important it is to know about the history of these colonies and reasons for their findings. Each of the colony had something different about it and unique. Each colony also has different religions, crops, culture and clothing. This all depends on where and how the colony was developed. From this essay you should have learned who was the founder of the colony, why it was established and in what year it was set up.

Public Comments

1. damm u!
2. OKAY! please dont tell me you actually excpect a normal person to read this! oh, and btw do your own work!
3. in my opinion i thought it was great!!! i think you should work on the last sentence in the last paragraph.... besides that everything was great..... here's another suggestion..... you should also add some interesting facts about how it was developed and founded to make your essay a little more interesting........ hope tis helped...... also good luk on the essay
4. This is an okay paper for middle school. You have a lot of good information but your style needs some work. Don't worry, it will get better as you practice. -Don't start off with a question -you shouldn't say I, you, we, etc. anywhere in a formal essay. -this sentence "Many of the first settlers in the North America came from England, they came for reasons such as these: wanted land to plant on, religious freedom, wanted to become rich or famous, needed a new beginning, wanted to escape paying debts and others." doesn't really make sense. how about saying "Many of the first settlers to North America came from England because they wanted land to plant on, religious freedom, to become rich or famous, a new beginning, or to escape paying debts." -Make sure you stay in the same tense "The 13 colonies of North America are" it should be are not were. -Same thing in the last sentence of the first paragraph -Do you have a thesis? -the next sentence needs a topic sentence. dont say "first lets talk" and if you do it should be let us or let's -proof read "The colony was build on a peninsula" it should be built, "died do to disease" due not do, "They did not stay their long" There not their. That's all ill say about typos. Ask one of your parents to proof read and they should catch the other mistakes. Also read your essay out loud and you should catch things yourself -"One of the New England Colonies is Massachusetts" how about another new england cology instead... -You start your conclusions with "In Conclusion, I hope that you understand how important it is to know about the history of these colonies and reasons for their findings" but your paper doesn't say why the colonies are important to know about. All you do is summarize what happened. Most analytical papers need an argument. Also, your conclusion is repetitive.
5. It's decent, but not exceeding. First off, I wouldn't start with a question such as yours. Make it interesting. Grab the readers attention rather then just state the boring facts. I am in 8th grade and we recently finished a lesson on the 13 Colonies, and all of your information is well-organized and correct. However, try to use different transitions other than, next, second, in conclusion.I also noted that your second paragraph was a bit lengthy. Try dividing it into different sections rather than one big blob. In your sentences I noticed you used the term 'and' a lot and words such as "another colony." In my opinion, that is not a very formal way of writing. In you concluding paragraph, you stated that you hoped readers understanded the concept of your piece. I don't think you should type whether or not they learned anything or not. But, you did sum up your points which is good. Overall, you are a good writer and are straight to to point. However, I suggest you put a bit more descriptive and engaging words in your piece to make readers more interested. You simply just state fact after fact after fact. I hope this helped you in a way! Keep up the good work. - Sara